See ehn, this life no balance at all. People don officially lose shame. I no even wan lie — I dey scroll through my phone when I jam one video from Lizzy Anjorin’s birthday, and lo and behold, who I see? My brother wife’s sister, front and center like say na her own naming ceremony.

I just weak.

I enter my brother wife’s DM like FBI:

“Aunty, your sister dey do influencer work now? Wetin she dey gain from all this Lizzy drama?”

She reply me coolly like say na normal thing:

“They sent her 10k and address. She was invited. She went.”

Wait, what?! 10k?!

So na so dignity cheap reach now? Just 10k and people don turn human decorations at party wey no get proper storyline. All of una wey show face for 10k, make una no worry — una fit still apply for Nollywoood extra role. You don already get experience.

But the real plot twist? Tope Alabi, the one everyone came to see — no show. People don wear their Sunday best, spray perfume, rehearse church smile, only for the headliner to ghost them. Omo the silence was loud! Even the jollof sef no sweet reach the embarrassment.

Now internet don scatter. People dey ask:

“Na birthday or content creation?”

“So na rented crowd dey hail Lizzy?”

“Where Tope Alabi dey when we need her?”

Lizzy gathered strangers like Avengers with 10k each, thinking she don run historic party. Meanwhile, people dey use the same 10k to buy back their self-respect in bulk.

Sha, lesson of the day — no be everybody wey crowd you dey happy for you. Some just dey count their 10k and form vibes. This one no be birthday again o, na budget event with borrowed clout.

Make una carry go. Tomorrow another episode go drop. But me, I go just dey with my popcorn.